Wednesday, December 14, 2005

Back with a vengeance after a weekend in the Greater Cincinnati Area...

Krildog called for a more inclusive TFT. So, while I'm not going to ditch football for this post, I'm just going to talk more in general about the weekend.

Don't worry, I'll still inexplicably put words in bold. Just because I can.

Syriana. Went to see this movie on Monday, and I enjoyed it quite a bit. I can't wait to read the novelization so that I can figure out what the hell actually happened. But, seriously, it was fantastic to see Deep Space Nine's Dr. Bashir tackle such a challenging role as an emir. Hey, if anyone can figure out what "Syriana" actually means or stands for, please let me know. Buckeye McGuinness and I couldn't figure it out. Our prevailing theory right now is that "Syriana" is the name of the fictional Arabic kingdom where the big-time emir and his sons live.

Speaking of Dr. Bashir...it seems our man Alexander Siddig has had quite a run lately playing characters named "Nasir." That was his character's name in Syriana, and, as Buckeye McGuinness uncovered, it was also his character's name in Kingdom of Heaven, which I watched yesterday on DVD. Curiously, in the Chris O'Donnell vehicle Vertical Limit, Mr. Siddig played a character named "Nazir," which is, as I'm sure you'll agree, freakishly similar.

George Clooney + Matt Damon = must-see movie for Studicus and Buckeye McGuinness. You see, my friend has a little bit of an obsession with Matt Damon. It's okay, the guy is a good actor. It's not like Buckeye McG wants to run away in a canoe with Matt Damon or anything like that (although, Buckeye McG was a little upset to hear Bourne got married). On the other hand, I have to admit I love movies with George Clooney in them (except for the one that never happened). Once again, no canoe involved. So, if you send Buckeye and Studicus to a movie with both George Clooney and Matt Damon in it, you're guaranteed we'll like it. Such is Syriana. Much of this immutable law is based on Ocean's 11 and Ocean's 12, which we both loved.

Speaking of such uncomfortable subjects...I also caught the trailer for Brokeback Mountain before Syriana. That is one of the most unsettlingly hilarious movie trailers I've ever seen. If you have a chance to check it out, please do so. You'll never be the same. Seriously, if they just would've come out and said, "Heath Ledger and Jake Gyllenhaal are gay cowboys," it probably would've worked out better. Much better than lines like, "there are some lies you have to tell" and "there are some truths that can never be known." Intermix this with shots of A Knight's Tale and Donnie Darko holding each other (including an inexplicable shot of one of them standing in the dark on a bridge with a cowboy hat and no shirt), and it's just too much.

(cough, cough) I feel the need now to talk about some manly stuff to reassure us all.

Funniest man alive. Just watched The 40-Year-Old Virgin yesterday, and got a big kick out of it and Steve Carrell. Krildog agrees, and says he needs to go buy it soon. I can't argue with that. Of course, he said that before the ending, which was one of the strangest "sudden, sharp left turns" I've ever seen. If you've watched the movie, you know what I'm talking about with the singing and dancing and all that stuff. My jaw dropped, and stayed open until it was all over. I still say that never happened, along with George Clooney as Batman, Superman IV: The Quest for Peace, and Police Academy: Mission to Moscow.

The Frozen Tundra of Paul Brown Stadium. I was at the Bengals-Browns game Sunday, and wow, it was pretty cold out there. How cold was it? So cold that the concession stand couldn't even bring itself to serve nachos with cheese that was even remotely lukewarm. Nothing better to warm you up on a cold day than ice-cold nacho cheese. But at least the Bengals won...barely.

The Colts scored again! That means, of course, that I didn't get to watch the Colts game. I taped it, and will watch it today or tomorrow. But I had my eyes glued to the out-of-town scores at Paul Brown Stadium. And I kept seeing the Colts add field goals time and time again. Usually, I'd hit Buckeye McG on the shoulder, and say, "They scored again!" And he'd be like, "What?" I'd reply, "The Colts, they scored again!!!" Oh, what fun. That brings another point to mind. Before the Colts finish their new stadium, they need to watch a game in Cincy, and see how they do stats and scores there. I love the Dome, but geez, how many times have I walked out of there going, "How many yards did Edge have? Did Peyton throw for 300 yards today?" That was mostly because the RCA Dome is incompetent when it comes to showing stats and out-of-town scores. At Paul Brown, you always know total team and individual yardage. And they have a scoreboard dedicated soley to other games. What a concept.

Who Dey Nation. Wow...I mean, I always liked the whole "Who dey? Who dey? Who dey think gonna beat them Bengals" thing, but c'mon! If you wear a piece of Bengals gear, suddenly, everybody's your best friend in the Greater Cincinnati Area. They'll probably shout "WHO DEEEEEEEEY!" at you. I think they should make that the official greeting of Hamilton County and Northern Kentucky. It can replace "hello."

There's no stopping the bird attacks now! Once again, I watched the SNL Best of Christopher Walken. It remains one of the funniest things I've ever seen. Of course, you know that now. And stop being a Stiffly Stifferson. I hate Stiffly Stiffersons.

That's all for now...gotta jet.

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