Sunday, April 30, 2006

Thoughts From The Mighty KrilDog (as Pearl Jam plays from the stereo)

Only Studicus will find the above picture funny.

  • Not very pleased with the Bears trading out of the first round. Chad Jackson was still on the board and we could've used another WR. I am happy with the selection of Devin Hester, though. Killer returner that could end up being a productive nickel back. I think they should line him up on O as well and use his blazing speed in all 3 aspects of the game.
  • Memo to Bill Polian: Nice job on the Addai smokscreen. Didn't even see it coming. If this guy can learn paitence and how to pick his holes he will be the man in a year or 2. Get him signed and start grooming him ASAP.
  • I called Vince Young over Matt Leinart to the Titans. Young= more upside and potential. Shocked as hell Leinart fell to AZ at 10 but they are rebuilding the line and he should be helming a rather explosive offense very soon.
  • Wow, the Jets didn't fuck up a first round pick for once. Shocking!
  • I grudgingly tip my hat to the New England GAYtriots for a great draft that added much needed depth to the Evil Empire.
  • The only reason Reggie Bush didn't go #1 is because the Texans wouldn't pay him $60+ million; and they shouldn't have too since they have 2 servicable RBs as it is. Mario Williams is gonna be a defensive beast since he can play all 4 line positions.
  • NCAA Football '07 comes out on July 3...can't friggin wait.
  • Rescue Me season 2 on DVD on May 9 (just preordered it today), and season 3 on FX begins May is good.
  • Can anyone explain why I had the song "Holy Diver" by Dio stuck in my head all week when I haven't heard it in months?
  • Holy shit! "Iron Man" has a director (Jon Faverau)! And they are writing a script for Thor! Excelsior!

Thursday, April 27, 2006

A few thoughts this morning

Quick update:

Krildog and I have another addition to my last column.

O.J. Simpson Clue. Hoping to cash in on the popularity of "Simpsons Clue" and the original detective game itself, Hasbro inked a deal with O.J. Simpson. The game didn't test very well, though, because there was really no mystery to it. The Juice did it every time.

It was funny at the time. About as funny as when I hallucinated Tuesday night that Krildog was eating mayonnaise straight out of the jar with a spoon when in fact he was eating fruit out of a jar with a fork. Once again...funny at the time.

And now for today's thoughts...

Return of the Gunslinger. Prepare yourself for dozens, perhaps hundreds, more stories like "Brett Favre's last trip," "Brett Favre's last start," "Brett Favre's first practice of his last training camp," "Brett Favre's Last Monday Night Game," "Brett Favre's last three-interception game," "Will Brett Favre be back next year?" etc. I love Favre, but you just know the media is going to blow this way out of proportion.

The Reds are on the radio! I've written about the Reds' deal with FSN Midwest before, but now it may really pay off. Cincy won again last night (I know...against the Nationals, so it almost doesn't count), putting their record at 15-7, just a half-game behind Houston in the N.L. Central; a series with the Astros awaits. Absolutely amazing. "Charles" Bronson Arroyo is now 4-0, and is quickly erasing the spectre of Wily Mo Pena from my memory. Wily who? Oh...yeah...that guy who used to strike out a lot. But he did hit the ball really far.

Pacers tonight. Well, we'll see what the blue and gold are made of tonight. The series shifts back to Conseco, and the Pacers have the chance to regain the series lead. I'd like to see a game tonight without bad officiating from the referees (and both teams have been hurt by this). I'd also love it if Jermaine O'Neal would keep himself out of foul trouble. Some of the call have been questionable, no doubt, but when you're in foul trouble, it's probably not a good idea to knock other players down, or bump other players too much. I know the Nets are flopping, but if they're going to get the calls, as a player, you've got to keep that in mind.

Draft Dodgers. Of course, NFL teams do this little song-and-dance every year when it comes to the draft. "We'll take this guy, no that guy, no the other one." You've heard it all before. Could the Texans pass up Reggie Bush for Mario Williams? Are they doing it in hopes of getting a more salary-cap friendly deal for Bush? Or is Vince Young still in the picture, since he'll always be the Pride of Texas? And what about the Colts? Will they go offense? We all know they need a running back, but don't be surprised if the team trades down for extra picks. After all, the Colts have just six picks in the draft's seven rounds this year. They pick very the first round. I wouldn't be surprised if they try to smokescreen a deal with Pittsburgh if LenDale White is still available. After all, the defending world champs have ten picks in the draft, and Bill Polian absolutely loves mid-round talent. White would also be a perfect fit for the Steelers. On the other hand, it may not be worth it for the Steelers to surrender a pick just to move up two slots in the draft. Heck, they may not even really want the former USC star, because, quoting Peter Griffin, "Everything I say is a lie. Except that. And that. And that..."

Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Transform, Roll Out...and May the Force Be With You

I've written plenty of stuff related to Star Wars (see this one and this one), so there's no doubt I'm a big fan. As Krildog can tell you, sooner or later, everything comes back to a Star Wars reference. If you don't believe me, consider this: while watching Billy Madison last night on Comedy Central, Applebee's (a.k.a Crapplebee's or Nipplebee's) aired one of its insipid commercials with the brokebackish singing duo. It's the same two guys who did those, um, fabulous "shrimp sensations" commercials that nearly ruined March Madness this year (see NCAA Blog #8 and Blog #15 for proof). While those idiots trampled on Bobby Darin's grave with a terrible "filk" version of Mack the Knife, all I could do was stare in astonishment. Krildog, on the other hand, extended his hands toward the screen, and screamed "UNLIMITED POWER!!" in his best crazy Supreme Chancellor-cum-Emperor Palpatine voice.

Further proof? Star Wars Transformers. I'm sure you've seen these things in stores. Don't get me wrong; I love Transformers and I love Star Wars. But I don't know yet if I love Star Wars and Transformers when they're merged together like the Constructicons into Devastator. It's just a little too out there for me. Heck, I didn't even like it when Marvel did its famous GI JOE vs. The Transformers story arc (that was an 80s innovation that popped up again in the late-90s, and I think it may be back again). Those two "universes" and products were tailor-made to work hand-in-hand. They targeted the same demographic, and could, um, realistically work together pretty well. Yet, something about the Autobots and Joes working together never quite felt "right" to me. It does, however, feel a bit better than merging The Galactic Empire with the Decepticons. And, the more I think about it, the stranger this line of thinking is.

Let's face it: Star Wars and Transformers probably have just as much in common as GI JOE and Transformers. While the Rebel Alliance isn't based in our solar system (it's in a galaxy far, far away, right?), the Transformers' origins are based in space. Cybertron could work just as well as any other planet in the Star Wars universe, and the prequel trilogy's love of mechanized characters (such as battle droids, the Techno Union, General Grievous, and Anakin Skywalker's transformation into a suit of armor) bears that out even more.

Yet, there's still something immensely disturbing to me about an X-Wing fighter that turns into Luke Skywalker. It just doesn't seem natural. It's a cross-over that feels extremely forced to me. It's as if the Hasbro board room went, "Hmmm...Transformers are profitable. Star Wars is profitable. Let's combine them!" That's pretty much the same way we got "Darth Tater" and the "Spudtrooper." Lucas Licensing really will sign off on anything!!!

So, in the tradition of GI JOE vs. The Transformers and other crossovers, I present a list of products that went too far before someone finally realized they were not good ideas.

My Little Pony Clue. This one comes courtesy of the geniuses at Hasbro, who thought putting My Little Pony characters in the classic who-done-it detective game would bring in large revenues. What they failed to realize is that the whole point of Clue is that someone has to die, and the object of the game is to find the murderer. "It was My Little Pony Bubble Bath Time in the stable with the Magic Glue Maker." Just not a good idea.

MC Hammer Mall Madness. Hasbro tried to cash in on the MC Hammer craze not once, but twice. The first attempt was scrapped in the early 90s because the creators realized MC Hammer's credit card wasn't going too far. A couple of years ago, Hasbro had the idea for a "Too Legit to Quit Edition," but that idea was also scrapped because the company realized that, despite a brief resurgence, Hammer Time was over.

Hungry Hungry Hippos Battleship. Hasbro again! The object was to strategically place your hippos on a numbered and lettered grid. Each player then took turns trying to blow the hippos out of the water. Needless to say, this wasn't well-received. Another special version, the "Shamoo's Sea World Edition" was also shot down because it, um, kind of resembled whaling.

Al-Qaeda/Terrorism Guess Who? While interesting in theory, the fact that questions like "Does your terrorist have a beard?" and "Does your terrorist look Middle Eastern?" didn't really help you eliminate anyone in the game. Kids also had trouble pronouncing names like "Muqtada al-Sadr," "Ayman al-Zawhri," and "Mahmoud Abbas al-Aqsa Mujadeenanajer."

ESPN's Bonds on Bonds. Wait. I guess some of these actually did get past the production phase. Only the Worldwide Leader in Sports would be able to swear the show came from the "entertainment department," and then turn around and run clips on Sportscenter as if they were real news. Amazing.

Straw: D.E.F. Crossovers were all the craze in GI JOE. Famously, there was a Refrigerator Perry figure. Not so famously, Hasbro tried to produce a Rocky Balboa action figure (the bio for the figure actually appears in the "Order of Battle" comic series that reprinted the file cards of each character accompanied by a comic book illustration of the character). The figure ended up becoming the Cobra baddie "Big Boa" (Balboa, Big Boa, get it?) Perhaps the worst idea for a crossover figure in the GI JOE line was the "Straw: D.E.F." figure in the early 1990s. The figure was based on former baseball star/crack addict Darryl Strawberry. Straw featured a "high-leg kick" attack based on Strawberry's real-life batting stance. Of course, Hasbro decided to use the figure in its D.E.F subgroup, which was unwise (D.E.F. stands for "Drug Elimination Force).

Power Rangers Voltron Line. With the Power Rangers' popularity wavering, Bandai tried to inject life into the series in the mid-90s by merging the Rangers with Voltron. The problem was that the toys were so similar to start with, no one realized they were a crossover product. Thankfully, the idea died during testing.

Smurf Condoms. Hoping to attract the attention of its grown-up audience, Hanna-Barbera commissioned blue Smurf condoms to reinvigorate the franchise. But parents' group were adamantly opposed, noting that the Smurfs are a children's show. In addition, test groups seemed to think the condoms weren't consistent with the show's continuity. After all, if there's only one Smurfette, and lots and lots of male Smurfs, it appears the little blue guys never used one themselves.

Teletubbies See 'n Say. Fisher-Price had to abandon this idea in 1997 after realizing no one could understand what the hell these characters were saying (or seeing!) in the first place. The company also bowed to pressure from the Rev. Jerry Falwell, who noted the Tinky Winky character in particular seemed effeminate.

FEMA Gulf Coast Rebuild Playset. A particularly distasteful Lego set was commissioned with a portion of the proceeds going to hurricane relief. The sets were to feature Lego emergency trailers, but they never arrived for test groups to evaluate them. Lego decided the situation was a little too sensitive to exploit, and backed down.

Monday, April 24, 2006

Stunning! Pacers "Steal" Home Court!!!

The Pacers TV announcers described it as a "stunning win."

I wouldn't go that far.

True, the Pacers are inconsistent. Ditto Jermaine O'Neal never really showed up until he surprisingly helped the team in the fourth quarter. And I can't argue with the fact the Blue and Gold absolutely blow on the road. "Stunning," however, would make the Pacers more like George Mason. Or NC State. Or the St. Louis Rams of several seasons ago. Those are stunning accomplishments. Beating the New Jersey Nets in one game is unlikely and surprising, but I thought it was possible. That means "stunning" can't apply.

Furthermore, the Pacers have not "stolen" home court advantage. I've heard this particularly loathsome phrase grow in popularity during the past few seasons. It's used whenever a lower-seeded playoff team upsets a higher-seeded team in the first game of a playoff series. Let's make something clear, however: having "home court" is not like playing capture the flag. You can't just steal it, and keep it. My point is this: if there's a game seven, it's going to be played in New Jersey. And, since a lot of these series tend to go seven games, the Nets still have the ultimate advantage. I fully expect the Pacers to lose at least a game or two at Conseco. Don't get me wrong: they're in excellent position to pull this thing off (especially if Vince Carter keeps pumping up those airballs; seriously, I know everyone rightfully complains about Kobe Bryant's rampant ballhogging, but Holy Lord, Vinsanity's performance killed his team, especially since Richard Jefferson didn't get the ball as much as he should have).

Still, if you are a Pacers fan (which I am, despite frequent criticism), you've got to be happy with a road win in Game One. Just don't say they "stole" home court advantage. That's just stupid.

In baseball news, leave it to the Cincinnati Reds to lose 11-0 to Milwaukee and then hand the Brew Crew an 11-0 loss the very next day on the road. Perhaps the Reds are the only team in Major League Baseball with this particular deadly combination of batting practice pitchers and home run derby sluggers. I'm not sure any other team could have pulled that off. All joking aside, the pitching has shown some flashes this year. Harang, Claussen, Milton (even though he's having surgery) and Arroyo have shown some really good stuff so far (of evidenced by the 11-0 drubbing on Saturday, they've also shown off some pretty bad stuff, too; in addition the other starter, Dave Williams, has a Mighty ERA of 10.50). The staff could get underrated Paul Wilson back in the rotation in the coming weeks, and that means the Rojos may actually assemble something remotely resembling a collection of real starting pitchers. Wouldn't that be something?

Quick job update: As I excitedly wrote last week, I sent seven resume/audition tapes to different markets around the Midwest. I have not heard anything yet, but am really hoping something will come through this week. I at least want to get a phone interview or a callback of some kind. I also plan to send a few more tapes out as more jobs open this summer. I am truly sick of my current job.

So that's about it from the Studicus Report. I'll try to keep things updated as the week progresses.

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

A Possible Tin Woodman Sighting...

With one game (Magic vs. Pacers) left in this roller coaster ride of a regular season, the Pacers are in the playoffs, but the positioning is not yet final. They could range from the 6th seed to the 8th seed. The only way I see Indiana falling to the final seed is if:

The Pacers lose, plus a Wizards win, and a Bulls win


The Pacers lose, plus a Wizards lose, and a Bulls win

Wouldn't that be nice? A first round meeting with the Pistons and many, many times hearing the PA guy scream DEEEEEEETTTTTTTRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOIIIIIIIITTTTTTT BAAAAAAAASSSSSSKEEEETTTTTBAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLL!

The season HAS been a thrill ride to say the least; the kind of ride that is quite disappointing in the end. At the beginning, most people were touting the Pacers as one of the top three teams in the Eastern Conference. After the Crazy One fiasco, people started to look at the Pacers another way. And they started to play another way. Stanky. There is no other way to put it; the Pacers, as of late, have been filling Conseco Fieldhouse, or whichever arena they are in while on the road, with some kind of noxious odor directly resulting from their sucky play.

In the end, after the dust clears, and the playoffs are over, I say Mr. Bird and Mr. Walsh have to clean house. In my opinion, Peja, Granger, and JO must be kept. I'd even keep Pollard, just because I love his style of play and he is just so damned cool. I like David Harrison, but he has shown some immaturity and laziness throughout this season. Let's keep him too, err, possibly.

But, get rid of everyone else, from "Crazy Stevie" to "Always Injured" Tinsley to Sarunas "I Couldn't Guard a Chair" Jasikevicius. Croshere's contract is expiring, so it could be used as a valuable tool in a trade.

Possibly can Coach Carlisle. I don't really advocate giving the coach the axe, and it should only be done at a last resort, but with this team, it might be needed.

Above all else, this team needs a pacemaker of sorts. It needs something to jumpstart its heart. Because, everytime I tune in for a game, I see a team with no heart. Sometimes, its like we have a team full of tin woodmen. And I cannot stand that...and I don't really think that either Walsh or Bird is the Great Wizard of OZ.

Stay tuned. The playoffs start soon, and then we have the Draft, and then all of the possible offseason moves. It'll be interesting, for sure.

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Back in the Habit

I got out of the habit of posting; now I'm back in the swing of things.


Ready to go.

I'm still awaiting for a post from Krildog, who continually asserts that he'll post something. It hasn't happened yet. Don't get me wrong, I know you're busy pal, but let's get to it.

I got the opportunity to catch a Reds game last night. A thousand thanks to you, FSN Midwest. Now, I don't have to just relegate myself to watching the Cubs, the Braves, or whatever teams ESPN forces us to watch (which are normally called the Red Sox and the Yankees). The Redlegs were playing Florida, but Brandon Claussen sure looked good on the mound. The offense was explosive, as expected, and Adam Dunn got things off to a really good start with a two-run bomb in the first. That guy is awesome.

One thing that I thought was interesting last night while watching the game is that Claussen, a lefty, bats right-handed. That means his throwing arm is exposed to the pitcher. I know this is a common thing, but the announcers were saying that it'd be a good idea for Claussen to wear some kind of pad or armor over his throwing arm when he's batting. After all, if he's throwing a great game on the mound, what's to keep the other team from throwing just a bit inside, possibly injuring him? Just something I'd never quite thought about from that angle before. I suppose I don't need to say it again, but I will: thank you FSN Midwest for showing nearly 70 Cincy games this year.

The Pacers finally beat a crappy team on the road. Congrats, blue and gold; maybe you'll actually pose a threat to some team in the first round after all. Then again, you'll probably get blown out by 40 in the next game, since we're never sure exactly what we're going to get from ya. I just don't know what to make of this team; they have the ingredients to go on a run and stay with just about anyone. On the other hand, they also have Crazy Stephen Jackson, whose unpredictable nature and spotty offensive production have caused a few problems here and there. I'd seriously just once like to see the Pacers play a full game with 100% effort, and without continually whining to the officials every time they blow the whistle. It really does get old (and that goes for everyone, especially J.O. and Jack; I've also seen Tinsley, Foster, Jones, Croshere...okay, okay...the whole freaking team whine, complain, and fuss).

In an unrelated note, who knew you could take the first steps of fulfilling a lifelong dream for just $21? That's how much postage cost yesterday for the seven resume tapes I sent to different markets around the Midwest. Now, I'll have to track them with delivery confirmation, and wait by the phone in hopes of getting a call from the markets in question. I've even scribbled down all the area codes for phone numbers in those markets so that I answer the phone if a station calls. I'm very excited right now. Let's hope I stay that way...

Monday, April 17, 2006

Of Bonds and Job Hunting

All right, it's really time to get back to TFTing (the verb form of "writing for TFT"). The blog has definitely been dead lately, with the only sign of any infusion of life coming from Stryder's "Prophecy Schmophecy" entry just two posts below this one.

I wrote recently that I found the fact baseball didn't excite me this year terrifying (Baseball Fever...Catch It). And, really, I'm starting to warm back up to The Show. I've listened to a couple of Reds games (darn you Albert Pujols...did you really have to hit that third home run?), and tried to keep up on things. The ever-present threat of Captain Cream & Clear really is dampening the excitement of the Boys of Summer; I mean, seriously, why did ESPN agree to his trainwreck of a show? Is anyone watching this? Is it going to change anyone's mind?

I was listening to talk radio on WNDE (that's right...the ESPN 950 boycott is still in effect after not being referenced to in several posts), and there's another Bonds book coming out that focuses more on his unlikability than the 'roids. According to author Jeff Pearlman's book Love Me, Hate Me: Barry Bonds and the Making of a Antihero (which sees its release tomorrow, 4/18), Bonds is nice to celebrities, select media people (though not too many of them, if you've ever seen an interview), and that kind of thing. However, when asked if he'd participate in a charity event, the author says Bonds told the person who asked to "go f*** off." His teammates, Pearlman claims, even voted him off the team at Arizona State by a 20-2 tally. The coach let him stay. He is, after all, the son of a baseball legend. In addition, Pirates fans will never forget the play in which Bonds failed to throw out Sid Bream in the playoffs. Pearlman says a teammate told Bonds to take a step in before the hit knocked Bream in; Bonds simply flipped him off. I don't think you'll find stuff like that featured in Bonds on Bonds.

I'm sorry to write about this guy, I'm just as sick of it as anyone, but I did find that particular interview interesting. I haven't read Game of Shadows, but I would like to. It's hard for me to make an opinion about the guy and believe it until I read the source material; I guess I'm just being too fair in this case.

I also wrote in my last post that I'm looking to ship out of Indy, and find a job as a TV sports guy. My audition tape is finished, and the cover letters and envelopes are sealed and ready to be mailed today. I don't know if I'll get any "nibbles" on this first round of searching, but I'd like to think I'll find something. I've targeted seven markets with open jobs so far ranging from Nebraska in the "West," to Dayton in the "East." I'm really hoping to stay in the Midwest. Since this is the first time I've ever done anything like this, truthfully, I'm shaking in my boots. I know I'm good enough to at least get an interview for one of these jobs, and I'll be disappointed if I don't get at least a callback from a station or two. If I do find myself in a new position, then there are a multitude of issues to deal with. I'll have to move, which will be expensive and entail breaking my lease, which will be even more expensive. I'm planning a wedding, and getting married in October. I don't have a great amount of money in savings, thanks to things like getting married.

I've talked to my fiancee's parents, my parents, friends, Krildog...basically everyone I can think of, and they all say I should just go for it, and worry about these other issues later. I'm sort of taking their advice; I mean, I'm definitely going for it, but I'm worried about several things. Sometimes, they're silly: how in the name of our Maker am I going to be able to move JumboTron C? Will I ever watch a Colts game again if I work outside Indiana? Other times, they're important: how in the world am I going to finance a move? Will I be paid at least the same amount of money I make in my current job?

Ah, but when destiny calls, you'd better pick up the phone, especially if you don't have caller ID. And oddly enough this is the perfect time and point in my life and career to pick up, and start fresh. Where I land, I won't know for a while. I may not even get a call or an interview. That's the fun part though, isn't it?

Friday, April 14, 2006

Alas, a new prophet rises from Greenwood...

Hark! Over the horizon, a new bringer of joyous good news arrives, a new power from the south (of Indianapolis).

His name: Stryder, a messianic figure promising fulfillment and continuation of the legacy those at TFT once proudly crafted.

Let us hope our new prophet can save this sacred marketplace of ideas, for the false idol of Studicus has been neglecting his people.

200th POST, BABY!!!!!
I don't know who's writing this apolocalyptic crap, but let me tell you something: it's summoned from a higher power.

After an atypically long absence, I have returned to TFT. I offer no apologies, but Krildog can confirm I've actually been very busy over the last week or so. If you were to ask why, I would provide an answer.


Well, dear friends and readers, I am now far more motivated from a professional standpoint than I've ever been, as anyone who has seen me knows. I tend not to talk about work too much on this forum; it's a topic that I steer clear of because you have to be so careful about what you write on the internet in regards to work. I'm not completely fearless, so you may have gathered from bits and snippets that I work at a news station in Indianapolis, and that I write the news.

Now, there are a few changes at the station. They are actually very good ones. However, they do not "jive" with my career goals. I'm a writer; they want me to be a producer, something I do not wish to be. So, it's time to shake the dust of the Circle City off my feet, and get moving along to doing what I have always wanted to do: become a sports anchor on TV (a radio or TV play-by-play man is also equal in desire). I have tried time and time again to volunteer to help our sports department; I have been turned down. Once, I was even bold enough to suggest that I should replace two of our fired sports anchors when I was just a year removed from college.

"Oh, but Studicus," the evil news director said at that time, "You're too young. We're too big of a market to let someone like you just have free reign on the air. For as long as you're here, you will obey us, and wither away in obscurity until you can stand it no more."

And so, that particular prophecy came true.

I was disillusioned.



For, at that time, my now-fiancee was finishing up school, and I couldn't possibly "pick up and leave" at that point. We weren't engaged, and I didn't want to take the risk. I waited around.

And waited.

And waited.

Again, I told the evil news director that I wanted to help in sports.

"You can run tapes for the Sunday sports show," she cackled, pretending she was helping when in fact she was again denigrating my abilities.

And so I watched.

And waited.

And waited.

Then, one day, my station hired a new news director of pure blood. One who would help nurture dreams, and not crush them. So, a week ago this morn, I sat and talked to him about my career vision.

"You should be a producer; it's a natural progression," the good news director said.

I mulled it over long and hard, carefully choosing my words.

"It's not my passion, sir," says I. "My passion lies in sports."

And so he suggested going out with the sports department, covering stories, working on resume tape material.

"This market is too big to start in, but go get some polish in a smaller place, and I'll bet you'll be right back here someday," he said.

And since that day, I have been a man possessed, writing cover letters and updating my resume, buying some actual nice clothes presentable for the TV medium, making arrangements to get a resume tape together, and going out with a photographer (aka "person who holds a video camera") to shoot footage of me in action at Indy's sports sites, like the RCA Dome, Conseco Fieldhouse, Victory Field, and the newest pile of dirt in the Circle City, Lucas Oil Stadium (I have trademarked "Big Oil" as its nickname).

And this is why, fellow TFTers (which is like one of Dickie V's PTPers, only cooler and without a silly DiGiorno commercial), I've been absent so much lately. I've been working hard, sleeping little (except for Wednesday), and hoping like heck that some station in Terre Haute, Champaign, IL, Rockford, IL, St. Joseph, MO, Dayton, OH, or elsewhere will latch onto me, allowing me to get that polish I so desperately need to be in TV.

I offer no excuse but my lifelong dream, and promise I'll do a better job in the future.

Just think of it as STUDICUS REBORN.

Thursday, April 13, 2006

Prophecy, smophechy

This post is just to appease the Blog Gods, so that molten lava will not rain down upon us here at TFT. Hopefully, we don't need to make a sacrifice. But, I swear, I will be back sometime soon, with some good posts. I've seen probably 30 movies in the past two weeks. And the NBA playoffs are coming. And the NFL draft is almost here.

Stay tuned.

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Prophecy of Doom

No posts since last the Trapeezius dying?

Thursday, April 06, 2006

Baseball Fever...Catch It

I'd like to start off by thanking Stryder for informing me that Sean Bean was a good guy in Flightplan. I haven't seen that movie, and the trailer made it look like he was somewhat of an unsavory character. So, in addition to Troy, he's also got that going for him as a role in which he's not evil.

Wow, baseball is here. I know it's a few days past Opening Day, but geez, I didn't really even get excited about the season this year. Maybe it's because of the World Baseball Classic, the constant "Barry Bonds, steroid abuser" stories I've seen on ESPN this offseason, or the fact I'm a Reds fan, thus meaning I have little to look forward to than cost-cutting measures, an injury from Ken Griffey, Jr., and a fire sale near the trading deadline.

It's just strange, because I usually get REALLY pumped up about Spring Training and Opening Day. They're usually more like holidays than anything else in my family. Maybe I'm just burned out by the Final Four, but dear me, where did my enthusiasm and love for baseball go? I can't blame the strike, because I really got fired up about the MLB during the Great Home Run Chase. Is it the juice?

Is the juice really to blame for all of baseball's problems? It can't be. I mean, sure, sluggers like McGwire and Sosa must've been taking something. There's no denying, besides hitting longballs (some of which still haven't landed), that Big Mac and Slammin' Sammy were also competing for who could look more like Thing from the Fantastic Four (if you doubt that, check out this previous post in which Barry Bonds confirms to TFT that he and the others are in serious denial). I'll never forget the thrill (and subsequent letdown when Bonds broke the mark the next season) of that terrific, fantastic, and wild summer. I got so into it, I even gave daily updates on the morning announcements during high school. It was big stuff, and I can still think about it in a nostalgic way.

So, why has baseball declined from last year to this year in my mind? There were some great stories last year, like the White Sox in the World Series (something I know Krildog enjoyed a lot). The Reds were actually even competitive for a span, even though "big-time acquisition" Eric Milton continually made it more like Home Run Derby for the other teams, especially in a hitter-friendly park like Great American.

Perhaps my resentment comes from the fact the Reds traded #21, the Great Mayor of Cincinnati, Sean Casey. And right now, a useless Casey jersey sits idly in my closet. It'll probably never be worn again, unless I do some yard work or have to have some sort of ritualistic ceremony (yes, this is a break in continuity from my 2005 Scrooge Awards).

Perhaps, with college basketball over, and now that I've had a chance to sort of deflate a little bit, I'll really get excited about America's Pastime again. After all, baseball is as American as apple pie (though it may be more popular in Japan and countries in South America). That doesn't mean it's just as special.

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

Random thoughts for the day...

...I haven't updated for a while, so here are some deep issues I've been pondering over the last few days.

  • Has anyone ever tried to move furniture up the steps in the Mines of Moria? We've lost seven couches already this week!
  • Why couldn't I do Don Corleone's voice work in The Godfather videogame? Drunk people tell me all the time I sound just like Marlon Brando when I do my impression
  • Is Starburst cheating by including the cherry and lemon flavors in their "sour" jellybean assortment instead of coming up with two new flavors?
  • While we're resetting all our doggone clocks for the first time in my life, will someone PLEASE figure out how to set the clock on my car stereo?
  • Will anyone ever return to Indianapolis after TWO DEATH STAR TORNADO WARNINGS this past weekend?
  • Last Thursday teased us with BEAUTIFUL weather. The promise was NOT kept.
  • Has Sean Bean ever played a good guy? The last few movies I've seen with him he's been a baddie: LOTR: Fellowship of the Ring (this is a little bit of a stretch, but he's still a little on the rough side), GoldenEye, Patriot Games, and National Treasure. Wait...he was Odysseus in Troy. So he's got that going for him.
  • If I hate Orlando Bloom so much, why do I own so many of his movies? (Troy, the LOTR series, Pirates of the Caribbean, and I want to buy Kingdom of Heaven)
  • Honestly, could the LOTR people crank the sound up any higher? I had to turn it down to 20 on my surround sound system; to put that in perspective, Terminator 2: Judgment Day was at like 40 and it wasn't mind-numbingly overpowering.
  • In the Tantive IV mission in the Singleplayer campaign on Battlefront 2, shouldn't playing as Darth Vader make you virtually impossible to beat? So why am I getting my arse kicked repeatedly on that level?
  • And, speaking of Battlefront 2, why are the gull darn freaking space missions so freaking impossible? If I die five times or less during one of those missions, I consider it a success; they've really taken a toll on my death-to-kills ratio.
  • And yes, there's still no stopping the bird attacks. That's for you, Krildog.