Monday, April 12, 2010

Solid Snake: Finally Regular

I tried my hand at another photoshopping contest on Kotaku. The theme this week is product placement in the Metal Gear series. I had a couple of ideas, but there was something about this one that stuck.

Wednesday, April 07, 2010

Behold the glory of Dook Helmet

I really can't make fun of Duke*. I mean, they beat the team I was rooting for. The Butler Bulldogs did just about everything right...except win the darn game. However, I couldn't shake the feeling that Butler was meant to win. Everything fell into place in classic Hoosiers fashion. There Jimmy Chitwood was, replaced with a sophomore named Gordon Hayward. The shot was there...the fade away so close. I even believed that halfcourt heave was going to make it. It would've been the perfect ending.

So I wondered...why didn't Butler pull it off? Why couldn't they? It's an explanation only the Evil Dook Helmet can offer.

*I can always make fun of Duke (spelled phonetically "DOOK")

Saturday, April 03, 2010

The Patron Saint of Coaches

It's not like Butler actually NEED any inspiration, and far be it from me to offer any advice.

However, the Patron Saint of Basketball Coaches, Norman Dale, has a couple of things he wants to remind the Bulldogs...

Friday, April 02, 2010

The Many Faces of Gene Keady (okay, just one, really)

Okay, here's the deal. I've always liked Gene Keady. Really. But the truth is the guy never takes a good picture. If you've ever seen him on the Big Ten Network, the man looks uncomfortable. So today at work I saw this picture of Keady doing his usual philanthropic thing by making an appearance at an event for Riley Hospital. And for whatever reason, Gene looks goofy. I can't explain it; it just made me laugh. It looks like Mr. Keady was photoshopped into the picture...he looks that out of place.

So, naturally, I took it to the extreme, doing some photoshopping of my own.

Get ready for the ride of a life time: Travels with Gene Keady.
First stop: You can see Mr. Keady here in this picture as President Obama is shaking a veteran's hand. Well, you would be able to see that except Gene Keady has stumbled in front of the camera. The question: does he know he's doing this or is he just unlucky?
Second stop: He coached for a long time. A really long time. When Gene Keady gives an inspirational speech about the Battle of Thermopylae, you should listen very closely. Sure, Leonidas gets all the credit as the star player. But where would he be without a coach? He'd probably be dead.
Third stop: I don't know how one acquires a ticket to the court of Jabba the Hutt. Obviously, Mr. Keady does. Oddly enough, he doesn't seem all that out of place amongst the Klaatu, Gamorrean Guards, and Quarren that make up Jabba's entourage. Although, honestly, he seems to be smiling too much. I bet he knows Jabba's rancor is going down.
Fourth stop: You can look at this one of two ways: Tim is running from Gene Keady, or he's running from the velociraptors. Personally, I don't think there's anyway the kid's making it out alive without a little coaching.
Fifth stop: Somewhere in Washington, DC, there is a warehouse. And buried deep within that warehouse you'll find each and every single top secret thing ever. What's Mr. Keady searching for? The national championship he should've won as a coach.
Sixth stop: Looking oddly svelte, Mr. Keady reminds us all he was actually an original Star Trek cast member. His run didn't last past the pilot; Gene was the original red shirt.
Seventh stop: Never one to turn down a benefit, Mr. Keady ventures into Cuba to some party he was invited to by some Italian family. Of course, Cuba plunges into chaos shortly afterward. Never mind the fact Mr. Keady seems underdressed.
Eighth stop: A true coaching Iron Man, Mr. Keady dons the prototype Iron Man armor when Tony Stark proves too much of a little girl to try it for himself. Sure, Stark gets the credit...but Mr. Keady's the real innovator here.