Friday, December 30, 2005

Studicus Selects 2005

After unveiling my "Scrooges for the Year that Was 2005," I decided it was a good idea to counterbalance that with some positive things; a kind of "best of" list from this year that has passed us by.

So, here is a very special column, my Studicus Selects for 2005.

Best Theater Experience. Without a doubt, it was Revenge of the Sith, which I saw at an 11 a.m. showing on opening day with my friend Brian, his wife, and my then-girlfriend, now-fiancee. The crowd was very receptive, and I enjoyed the movie immensely. Who knew R2-D2 could do so much (well, except for George Lucas)? I really enjoyed it, and stayed spoiler-free throughout (didn't even pick up a copy of the novelization beforehand). It really packed a punch. The "big audience" experience was even better than the special press screening I got to go to two weeks before it opened.

Favorite DVD Purchase. Actually, this one wasn't very close, either. The Best of SNL Christopher Walken disc is tremendous. Oh, I know, I've written about this a lot. But the truth is, it's the thing I find myself quoting the most these days. And I've drawn Buckeye McGuinness into my insipid trap as well. "I pranked him to death with a tire iron," and "There's no stopping the bird attacks now!" are now staples of my life, much to Krildog's disdain.

Favorite Xbox Game Purchase. It's not even close: NCAA College Football 2006. It may be the best football game I've ever played, and is leaps and bounds ahead of Madden in terms of graphics, presentation, depth, and, most importantly, overall fun. I still love how I created a quarterback, who turned into a coach, who still roams the sidelines at Notre Dame. Right now, we're breaking in a second-year QB who will guide the program to continued greatness.

Favorite Boxed DVD Set. Hmmmm...there aren't a ton of contenders for this honor, but I'm going to have to go with my new Seinfeld Season 5 set. It's got a ton of great episodes ("The Puffy Shirt," "The Bris," etc.) that I remember watching over and over again in syndication. I haven't even started to scratch the surface on the extras yet, either.

Best Purchase, Jewelry Category. Only one nominee in this category, but it's definitely my fiancee's white gold monstrosity of a ring that threatens to bankrupt me and burden Krildog with a new monthly "occupancy" fee (I know...that's just mean!). But there's no doubt it was a terrific buy, and I couldn't be happier. You hear me? I'm happy.

Most inspired Christmas Gift. I received a Walker, Texas Ranger boxed set for Christmas. I thought it was an inspired idea on its own merits. My co-workers and I joke a lot about Chuck Norris, and the Walker, Texas Ranger Lever that Conan O'Brien uses is one of my favorite gags. With that in mind, the DVD set was a terrific idea. Little did I know what my co-workers had planned. They built me a Walker, Texas Ranger Lever of my own, which now sits proudly in my living room. I haven't used it yet, but that's about the most clever thing anyone could have thought of.

Best Comedic Trailer for a Movie that Will Probably Get a Best Picture Nomination. If you've read TFT in the past week or so, then you know the Brokeback Mountain trailer made me bust a gut. Lines like, "Why can't I quit you?" and "You don't go up to that mountain to fish, do you?!" are just too much for me to handle. Sure, I should be able to handle the "Gay Cowboy movie" with a mature outlook, and appreciate its merits as a work of art. But, dammit, this is waaaaaaaay more fun.

Best Personnel Move, NFL. Without a doubt, the Colts' acquistion of Corey Simon helped set the tone for this season, and showed the league the Horseshoes meant business this year. Let's just hope they can cap it all off with a big, shiny trophy. "Multiplex" has meant more to this defense as a leader and a movie theater than any other player in the NFL this season.

Best New Product, in Your Grocer's Freezer. The Good Humor line of ice creams that Krildog has been buying lately. Sure, I know it's December, and that ice cream shouldn't be on my mind at all. But this stuff is so excellent, I just can't help but mention it. I mean, it's fantastic, and I could eat the stuff all day.

Best Purchase, Overall. Ah...this goes back a way this year. Without a doubt, my pride and joy is my 55" Mitsubishi CRT Rear-Projection TV. It's huge, it's awesome, it's hard to move, but it's well worth it, especially considering the deal I got on the thing. I'm very pleased with the TV, and so is my future wife. Watching a college or pro football game in HD is perhaps the greatest thing ever conceived by man.

Favorite Non-Sensical Segue/Spoof in "Family Guy" Episode. For me, it was when Flint from GI JOE showed up, and talked about the evils of alcohol to Chris and his friends during a dance. The rest of the episode was so-so, but that was pure genius. Of course, no one else may think that, but Flint has a special place in my heart, and in Krildog's worst nightmare.

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